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Death in the Internet
Dear friends,
I was supposed to put in an entry about something that happened this morning when I received a highly unusual email.
A few weeks ago, I posted on the ML Armchair Slash (something I rarely do), and I received what I thought to be was a reply to that post, which it wasn't. The reply turned out to be from the brother of the person who owned the email address, informing me (and everyone else that she corresponded with, or everyone else who sent her an email) that she had passed away a few months ago, and that he was simply just setting her affairs in order and letting everyone else know.
I've never been in a situation like this, actually, and it got me into thinking. If people we know die in real life, we usually would hear of it because we know them through our connections with them, and everyday activities that we have with them. Institutions like schools, offices, etc. ground people in a sense, and sort of help in everyone knowing where everyone else is. If someone dies, we'll at least notice something's wrong because we never see them around and family would most likely send out notices to the institutions these people belonged to, so even if they were only acquaintances, we'd most likely receive word anyway.
In the Internet, though, things are so much more different. For the most part, each of us are connected to each other solely when we ourselves decide to interact with other people. Our email addresses are our own, we decide which forums to go to and which people to keep talking to (and make really good friends with), and even then nothing substantial would tie us there. Most of the people we know in real life don't know who our friends are in our cyber-life, so what happens when we die? Very few would have relatives who'd know of separate email accounts we may keep, and even less would even know our passwords.
I'm just saying that it's really.. strange. If I were to die within the next few weeks, for instance, no one would be able to tell my LJ friends about it, or the people at FAP, especially my shipmates, or my adopted newbie (long graduated but to whom I still write) in Unredeemed. I'd just fade out, popping out of nowhere at the beginning and disappearing just as easily. The people I've been friends with would never really know what happened either.
(I had a friend once, and we exchanged emails, and we grew close, but one day she stopped writing. I wonder what happened to her.)
So in any case, now that I've put myself in this sort of mood, I want to take this chance to tell all of YOU that I'll be here forever, and if I go, I'll always tell you where and what I'm doing, and JUST IN CASE, if I never know what's going to happen and if heaven forbid the worst DOES happen, if you haven't heard a word from me for at least three months and there was no prior announcement, then you'd have known what happened to me. And know also that I feel very happy with all of you and I have the best times with all the discussion going around, and you are very very dear to me.
I hope this doesn't come off as too melodramatic. I just want to make sure you know. :D
Love,
Slumber
I was supposed to put in an entry about something that happened this morning when I received a highly unusual email.
A few weeks ago, I posted on the ML Armchair Slash (something I rarely do), and I received what I thought to be was a reply to that post, which it wasn't. The reply turned out to be from the brother of the person who owned the email address, informing me (and everyone else that she corresponded with, or everyone else who sent her an email) that she had passed away a few months ago, and that he was simply just setting her affairs in order and letting everyone else know.
I've never been in a situation like this, actually, and it got me into thinking. If people we know die in real life, we usually would hear of it because we know them through our connections with them, and everyday activities that we have with them. Institutions like schools, offices, etc. ground people in a sense, and sort of help in everyone knowing where everyone else is. If someone dies, we'll at least notice something's wrong because we never see them around and family would most likely send out notices to the institutions these people belonged to, so even if they were only acquaintances, we'd most likely receive word anyway.
In the Internet, though, things are so much more different. For the most part, each of us are connected to each other solely when we ourselves decide to interact with other people. Our email addresses are our own, we decide which forums to go to and which people to keep talking to (and make really good friends with), and even then nothing substantial would tie us there. Most of the people we know in real life don't know who our friends are in our cyber-life, so what happens when we die? Very few would have relatives who'd know of separate email accounts we may keep, and even less would even know our passwords.
I'm just saying that it's really.. strange. If I were to die within the next few weeks, for instance, no one would be able to tell my LJ friends about it, or the people at FAP, especially my shipmates, or my adopted newbie (long graduated but to whom I still write) in Unredeemed. I'd just fade out, popping out of nowhere at the beginning and disappearing just as easily. The people I've been friends with would never really know what happened either.
(I had a friend once, and we exchanged emails, and we grew close, but one day she stopped writing. I wonder what happened to her.)
So in any case, now that I've put myself in this sort of mood, I want to take this chance to tell all of YOU that I'll be here forever, and if I go, I'll always tell you where and what I'm doing, and JUST IN CASE, if I never know what's going to happen and if heaven forbid the worst DOES happen, if you haven't heard a word from me for at least three months and there was no prior announcement, then you'd have known what happened to me. And know also that I feel very happy with all of you and I have the best times with all the discussion going around, and you are very very dear to me.
I hope this doesn't come off as too melodramatic. I just want to make sure you know. :D
Love,
Slumber
no subject
Yeah. I was thinking my brother is the only one who knows what my passwords are, but he wouldn't actually think to tell everyone I know what happened to me. It's just not one of the things people remember to do, right?
And I can definitely picture those urban legends. ;D Thank God at least now there are LJs with which we can get updates on the lives (or not lives) of people, at least. Imagine before, when there was only email! :O
*<3333s back*
no subject
You know I don't ever want to think of our internet lives as also bound by death, cause this is a place where in a weird sense we all come alive, and make friends and challenge the limitations of RL. And for death to destroy that, it's just sad. *huggles* anyway because in net and RL, you're a brilliant friend. ;)
no subject